congeries

1. Know and follow IBM's Breathing Conduct Guidelines

2. Breathing, circulation and other forms of biological functions are individual processes. IBMers are personally responsible for the air they inhale and exhale. Be mindful that the air you consume is being shared by others.

3. Identify yourself - name and, when relevant, role at IBM - when you breath. Breathe in the first person. You must make it clear that you are breathing for yourself and not on behalf of IBM.

4. If any air you exhale has something to do with work you do or subjects associated with IBM, use a disclaimer such as this: "The air I exhale is my own and does not necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies or opinions."

5. Respect polution, smoking and financial disclosure laws.

6. Do not disclose IBM's or another's confidential or other proprietary information while breathing.

7. Don't exhale on clients, partners or suppliers without their approval.

8. Show proper consideration for others right to breathe

9. Find out who else is breathing and exhale towards them

10. Don't pick fights, be the first to smell your own bad breath, and don't alter previously exhaled air without indicating that you have done so.

11. Try to add value, and for goodness sakes use a breath mint.

Whether or not an IBMer chooses to breath or engage in other forms of biological function is his or her own decision. However, it is very much in IBM's interest - and, we believe, in each IBMer's own - to be aware of these important biological processes. - Corporate Guidelines for IBM Breathers: Executive Summary